


Seasons of the Heart

by emmykay



Series: Day and Night [4]
Category: Ookiku Furikabutte | Big Windup!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-02-02
Updated: 2015-02-02
Packaged: 2018-03-10 02:43:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3273770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emmykay/pseuds/emmykay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Scenes from a domestic life.  Sakaeguchi/Abe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Seasons of the Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sakaeguchi wants to tell his mother something very important. Graveside visit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Coming back around to [ this idea ](http://mmmbuttery.tumblr.com/post/100462201128) from twitter.

Cherry blossom season. Sakaeguchi Yuuto has a reason to find the season poignant, maybe more than most. 

It's sunny today, breezy. Gorgeous.

Like he does this time of year, every year, he goes up to the old cemetery. When he can arrange it, he tries to go with at least one of his siblings, or his father. It's harder now, since they all live in different places. This year, he's alone.

He sees that the dead leaves have been cleared off, the previous year's effects on the stone memorial brushed away. A fresh bouquet of daffodil and aster sits in a small urn at the side of the stone. Wakako, he thinks, grateful.

He lays his own small bunch of bluebells against the headstone, bows his head. Whatever organization there had been to his thoughts are gone – scattered by the pressure of having to speak them, even to a listener who isn't even here.

"Mama," he says, "I've missed you. This year especially. A lot of things happened that I want to talk to you about."

Yuuto goes on to sketch some details about his graduate degree program, his advisor, his friends. He knows he's skirting the big issue, the one he really wants to talk about. His mother would know that, too.

He takes a deep breath. "I'm going to get married. To Abe Takaya. I've told you about him before and I'm pretty sure you met him, back when I was in middle school. He's – he's " a reluctant smile blooms on Yuuto's face, " – not the most patient person, and he's a little gruff, but he's a good man. He's really smart, and he loves kids and dogs, and he tries so hard."

While Yuuto had a good relationship with his mother while she lived, he sometimes can't help thinking or speaking to her like the fourteen-year-old boy he was when she passed. Right now, he can't say _I love him._ Nor can he say, _He loves me._ No matter how much he wants to. That's for other children to say to other parents, ones who had each other when they grew into adulthood. 

"I know we don't have a lot of money right now, but I think - I think we'll be happy," he says, finally. "Papa says he likes him, but you know Papa would say anything to get along." 

Something squeezes hard in his chest, the corners of his mouth twist downward. He reaches out to the smooth edge of the headstone, his voice drops to a murmur. "I'm glad you did get to meet him. I wish things were different. I wish you were here. I wish I could see you, and tell you this in person. I want you to know and to - to approve. I wish I could ask you for your blessing." 

Yuuto sighs, his throat tight and dry. He leans backward, his hand dropping to his side. He didn't know what he was expecting. The stone never warmed up under his fingers. It never does. 

A little breeze kicks up, and the shadows of the branches overhead flutter. A few early blossoms drop off the trees, float downward to land around him. One in particular, a perfect pale pink, lands on his sleeve.

Yuuto looks down on it and smiles. It's beautiful. He picks it off his arm and holds it against his lips. He feels a lightening in his heart, an easing of the ache in the back of his throat. And that's all he needs. 

He looks up at the blue sky, the trees in bloom, the fat white clouds drifting overhead.

He smiles upward. Gorgeous.


End file.
